Relief and Recovery

When the call came from the surgeon’s office, I answered with nervous trepidation. I was so afraid I’d hear them tell me about melanoma in my lymph nodes, that it had somehow spread to nearby tissues, perhaps metastasized throughout my body. In my worst fears, my body’s cells had been completely replaced by melanoma infected cells,  all replicating at such a rate that I had become more cancer than human, a malignant, spreading disease that devours all.

So, with these thoughts echoing in my brain, I answered the call.

“Mr. Adkins, great news! We were able to remove all of the melanoma from your shoulder and the lymph node biopsy was clear! I’m sure you were waiting eagerly to hear.”

I was so happy to hear those words, and I thanked the nurse for her call and the good news and kind words. 

What a swift, horrifying process from diagnosis to surgery, and now recovery, and relief. My family and friends, thanks for all the well wishes and supportive messages! I hope you all know how much you mean to me. 

I am so, so relieved.

Now I can get back to focusing on summer fun! 

S is for Surgery

Monday, June 30th was mine and Ashleigh’s 13 year wedding anniversary. It was also the date for my melanoma wide area excision and sentinel lymph node biopsy. Mom came down the evening of the 29th to spend the night with us, so she could be there at the hospital with me. Ashleigh drove, we dropped Penny off to stay with Catie so she could play with Scarlett. We made it to St. Joseph’s Hospital at about 8 AM. First stop was nuclear medicine to begin the lymphoscintigraphy process. This was a series of four injections of radiotracers near the melanoma, to determine which lymph node may have been infected. They made observations throughout, and the process took about two hours. I fell asleep on the scanner and slept through most of it. 

Then it was around 10:00 or so, and time for surgery prep. I never had surgery before, and had never had the need for an IV before. This was the part I was dreading the most, but the nurse was awesome, and Ashleigh and mom talked me through it and kept me from completely freaking out.

 

Then they wheeled me back to the O.R. I remember it was very cold in there! The anesthesiologist came to talk to me about what she was giving me, and once she administered the general anesthesia she asked me about the last vacation I had. I said “the beach!” And then I remember really wanting to tell her there are beaches on BOTH sides of Florida, and I was out. 

I came back up sometime around 2:30 in the afternoon, with an incision that was glued together in my right armpit, and a long bandage on my right shoulder. Touching the bandage, I couldn’t help but think about my Mamaw, peeling and slicing apples to make apple pie. Just like an apple on her table, the surgeon cut the bad places from my shoulder and discarded them. 

Now, we wait. My incisions will heal, given time. There is a 10 to 15% chance that the cancer had spread into my lymph nodes. If so, I’ll begin a year long immunotherapy program. If not, then I’m melanoma free! Either way, I’ll be seeing the dermatologist more frequently, probably every three months for a year. 

What a whirlwind the past month has been! Just a panic inducing thrill ride into the American health care system. And while I’m not through the woods just yet, I hope to have some answers soon.  

M is for Melanoma

This summer is off to a dizzying start! We have enjoyed spending time with Penny, playing outside on the playground or in the pool, or in the cul-de-sac with neighbors and their kids riding bikes with Penny. Family photos, which turned out great. A little movie time with Ashleigh. Fun stuff!

I used the time to schedule my annual physical, and my doctor checked out an unusual mole on my right shoulder that Ashleigh had noticed back in the spring. She referred me to a dermatologist who biopsied the site and it turned out to be a superficial spreading melanoma. The tumor had extended 1.3 mm down into my skin. 

Today I met with a surgeon who will perform a wide area excision on the site to remove any potentially lingering melanocytes, and will do a sentinel lymph node biopsy to ensure the cancer hasn’t spread into my lymphatic system. He said the likelihood of that is low, but still worth checking. He also seemed very positive that the procedures would work out and that I’d be melanoma free afterwards. This has left my head reeling, and even though the outlook is good, I’m still feeling anxious about the whole thing. 

Melanoma is such a weird and sneaky type of cancer. What looks like a mole on your skin can turn out to be so much more. I had never been to a dermatologist before, and I’m glad I took Ashleigh’s advice and got it checked out! 

More info: American Cancer Society

School's Out (24/25)

This school year was full of personal and professional growth for me, and was a year of healing for myself and (I think) many others at school. I learn how to be a teacher more and more each year. Building good relationships with the students is so important, and I think I did a better job with that this year. Our admin was super supportive, and that went a long way toward making things run well and helping teachers maintain motivation throughout the year. 

The 24/25 8th grade students were an amazing group of kids who were curious and fun, and that made teaching them rewarding. One of my science students found my "See The Good" stone someone painted for me a couple of years ago, and hid it on top of my marker board - just out of sight from below. I found it today while I was cleaning up, and even though they have only been gone a couple of days, it made me miss them. 

My classroom is cleaned up and ready for summer, and so am I. So long, 24/25 School Year! You were pretty good, if exhausting at times. 

Breath of The Wild, Breath of Fresh Air

In the first few moments of The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, you emerge from a cavern into a post apocalyptic Hyrule 100 years after your failed attempt to stop the calamity which had befallen the kingdom. 

You failed. And the world as everyone knew it ended. 

Your friends are long gone, because of you.

Of course, these memories come creeping back as you follow the storyline through the game to its conclusion. From no memory of what happened to the unbearable pain of remembering everything. 

All that can be done is to try to remove the calamity from the kingdom, like excising a cancerous tumor. 

First you have to gain access to the innermost chambers of Hyrule Castle, where you find Calamity Ganon. He's tough! But I did all four of the Guardian Beast dungeons, so he starts with half of his health. Even so, this was a tough fight! 

Once Ganon is defeated, it doesn't end there! Like any good final boss in a video game, he transforms into something larger and more horrible than before. As Dark Beast Ganon, he strides tall, looming close in the field outside of the castle. You are teleported there and are given the magical arrow, the only means of defeating this world-ending terror. From horseback, you must strike several weak points on Dark Beast Ganon's blight riddled body before he destroys the last vestiges of Hyrule's survivors. 

In short, it is brilliant! From the moment you emerge from the cave in the beginning of the game with no memory to the final acknowledgement from Princess Zelda that you are indeed the Hero of Hyrule, Breath of the Wild is a work of art. It took me quite a long time to finish the game, because I wanted to wander the breadth and depth of the kingdom. It is an extraordinary video game experience. A breath of fresh air. 

Car Shopping Anxiety

*Note: This is an old post that I wrote on 7/10/2022, but never published. Here it is, almost two years later!

The mission: Buy a used car from the past 4 years or so, in the price range of $19,000 to $24,000. That would fit in our budget and be quite an upgrade from the 2008 Pontiac G6 I had been driving for the past several years. The G6 was a generous gift from my mom, but it was starting to show its age. It leaked oil, power steering, and brake fluid. One of the driver seat posts had broken. It was approaching 200,000 miles, and even though it had been an excellent work commuter, it was starting to make us nervous about its capability to make it long distances. I kept the fluids up, made sure to check them before leaving the house on longer drives.

The G6 died on the highway last weekend on a return trip from mom's cabin in Elliott County. Penny was in her carseat, and slept through the whole scary situation! Luckily, we were close to home, just outside of Lexington on I-75. Ashleigh made it to us in just a few minutes, and our insurance covered a tow to a mechanic.

A rebuilt engine could cost between $600 and $1,000. Not bad, but we felt it was time for something newer. So, the lazy car search that had been occurring became our top priority.

I had decided that a small SUV might be the best thing. Penny’s stuff would fit in it more comfortably, and maybe we could use it for road trips, to offset the mileage that we had been putting on Ashleigh's 2016 Chevy Equinox LS.

Fairy quickly, I was overwhelmed with options!

Among the contenders were:

2019 Jeep Renegade

2018 Toyota RAV4

2017 Buick Encore

2018 Chevy Trax

2017 Mitsubishi Outlander

2017 Nissan Rogue S

2018 Chevy Equinox LT

And so, I threw myself into the world of automobile journalism. It’s a deep hole to swim in. Near the shallows, there are auto bloggers and YouTubers, some of whom had good comments and thoughtful reviews. Toward the deeper end, JD Power, Edmunds, Car and Driver. Edmunds in particular had these reviews where someone would drive a car for a year and write about their experiences. This in particular was interesting to me. 

My heart wanted the Jeep Renegade. My brain wanted either the RAV4 or the Equinox. Actually, the little Buick was fun to drive and had a lot of nice features. But ultimately, interior space for a car seat and passenger were the most important considerations, after vehicle safety and projected longevity. That basically eliminated everything except for the Equinox and the RAV4. But the RAV4 had more miles, was $4,000 more and a little over budget. 

I did the sensible thing. I didn’t buy the Renegade. I went with the Equinox. We’ve driven the 2016 model for years, and it has been a great car. Why not add one to the fleet? The car seat fits and the passenger doesn’t have to squeeze in. It gets decent mileage for an SUV. And,  maybe when Penny is a little older, maybe I can trade it in toward a Jeep. 

But for now, we are a Chevy family.

Thanksgiving

 It was, in general, a somewhat bittersweet Thanksgiving. It seems each year there are more empty seats at the table. We miss our grandparents. We’re thankful for Penelope, who has been bringing joy into our world for the past 17 months. Our grandparents would have loved Penny. Would each have absolutely been wrapped around her finger. 

But it was a good day. I made a giant turkey, in the oven this time. Dinner turned out great. My mamaws would both have been proud. Penny laughed a lot and played outside.  The weather was nice. Another day to celebrate. I hope everyone had a wonderful day.